Q:Have you ever seen that coffee commercial with the gay German guy, and at the end he says, "toot toot"? Well, what if it was Soderburg instead. What if he said, "Here, take de coffee drinking, ya?" And then he would start squinting his eyes and giggle like crazy, wipe his nose on his sleeve, drop the bag of coffee in the woman's cart and walk away.
soderberg or seidenberg?
what the actual fuck
what do you think about when you watch tv
Q:I need help. All my friends hate me and make fun of me behind my back. They hate the bruins and say the players are dumb, stupid, and can't play. All the boys do that too. I just want to move back to New England. 7th grade Blackhawks fans are by far, the RUDEST people I've ever talked to. Anything I should do?
i’ll answer the other anons later this one is probs more important
okay my sister is in 7th grade and shes like 12 this is trippy
im sure your friends dont hate you. you just feel like they do because that is a natural thought process of early adolescence. dont worry about that. someone’s sports fandom should and will never get in the way of irl friendship
the only reason why that would happen is if like, that’s all you talk about with them. are you like…always talking about hockey and whatnot? you gotta not do that, because it’s obviously something you dont have in common with them
did the vikings fucking score a touchdown
anyways. you cant get offended for the sake of the bruins. you gotta take a step back. theyre a professional sports team. youre in middle school. dear god youre in middle school. you cant get offended on their behalf. nothing you can do can affect how they play. yes, you like them, but it seems like your obsession is getting in the way of your friendships.
just….try not to bring up sports in front of them so much. it seems like theyre just teasing you because they have nothing else to talk about with you, so that’s all they can do. you really gotta talk about other things. tone it down on the hockey while in public. middle schoolers are all insecure. they make fun of things when they don’t know what else to say or do. they constantly feel inferior and confused. so thats why it feels like youre always being attacked. but youre not. soooooooooo just enjoy chicago and hawks fans are cool yo. its the pens fans you wanna avoid.
seriously, take a break from tumblr too. it just heightens the obsession
Q:how do you think tuukka would react if I gave him a beyonce cd at a meet and greet on sunday and said "I heard you were a fan" because I'm seriously considering it but I feel like I would chicken out and just not do it
dont do it because he wont know what youre talking about
did you guys already talk about the rookie card dougie sketched for himself
Raskkkkkk you’re perfect
ive got time for a quick analysis aka im making time for this
- TUUKKAS FUCKING KAGUSHBGDFKHDHfs
- HIS KASHUGu
- HIS LAGUH THOUGHT
- I LVOE HTIS LIVAHG
- LIKE HE SOUNDS LIKE A BOY
- I LVOE ITH
- ITS SO NOT HIM
- HE BECOMES THIS REAL GENUINE PERSON
- WHAT IS TRHAPPINg
- "WHI MAKES THEAS QUESTIONS" THAT MAENS THERES MORE, THAT MEANS THERES MORE QUESTIONS AND THERES GONNA BE MORE VIDEOS LIKE THIS
- tuukkas not used to shit like this. the bruins PR doesnt normally do this so you know hes just taken aback. for the first time in his life
- k-tapp laughs too so you know shes like embarrassed in tuukkas presence like oh god a female made him laugh irl what have you done what door have you opened
- ovie is an irl slut
- taylor hall is basically the demographic for kate upton fans
- alright rick nash no one asked for your life story
- cammalleri youre gay we get it
- ryan getzlafs head is embarrassing
- crosby sort of looks like jennifer garner. im sorry jennifer garner. crosbys irl celeb crush is channing tatum lbr
- logan couture IS A FRAT BRO. HE IS ACTUALLY A FRAT BRO. THAT IS A FRAT BRO REACTION TO EVERYTHING. “dude, you gonna get it in with her? shes a first year. youre a fourth year” and couture just makes that nod like “i know bro thats why its goooood”
- matt duchene seems like the kind of person to cry over rachel mcadams movies
- christ eberles gap is in full force
- TUUKKAS FUCKING LAGU h
- PTUS TUKA IN THIS SITHAUTIONS
- HES LIKE
- HE JUST PICKS A RANDOM PERSON YOU KNOW HE DID
- HE JUST ROLLED HIS EYES AND PICKED A RANDO
- DO YOU KNOWWHY
- omg this girl in my class just turned to this girl next to her and asked “are you jewish”
- TUUKKA DOESNT HAVE CELEB CRUSHES. HE DOESNT “CRUSH”
- HE JUST “ATTAINS.”
- HE DOESNT NEED TO CRUSH. HE CAN GET ANY GIRL HE WANTS. HE DOESNT HAVE AN UNATTAINABLE CELEBRITY HE CAN GET ANY BITCH HE WANTS IN THE WORLD
- HE JUST PICKS BEYONCE SO HE LOOKS NORMAL BUT LBR TUUKKA ISNT NORMAL HE RUNS THE WORLD
- he wants k-tapps dick to fulfill his everlasting thirst
- I CANT WITH HIS FUCKING LAUGH IN THE END HE LAUGHASOJASGOIDMSODGSDMGOSDG
tuukka rask + celebrity crush.
Q:I was watching 'Behind the B's' and in the third episode, before the game, the team cheered Tuukka in the change room. This guy just sat there, no emotion - like it should be happening. Is this guy even a human? Is he even real? Finnish hologram.
its because he expects the cheers, the praise. he’s not surprised by it and its just casual to him. its only when they go above and beyond the praise by buying him a car that he glances up at them
How many Virginia college students does it take to change a light bulb?
Christopher Newport University students: 360, 1 to change the bulb and 359 upperclassmen to bitch about how they got screwed over by housing
Eastern Mennonite University students: Two, one to hold the candle, and the other to strike the flint.
George Mason students: Three, if they get lucky and one of them has taken the course at NOVA.
Hampden-Sydney students: Five, one to actually change the light bulb, and four to figure out how this could get some Longwood girls to come over.
Hollins College students: None, that’s what maids are for.
James Madison students: None, Harrisonburg doesn’t have electricity yet.
Liberty University students: None, God said “let there be light” and all was good, and no one questions Falwell.
Longwood students: None, the Farmville Super Wal-Mart has fluorescent lighting.
Mary Baldwin students: Four, one to change the light bulb, and three to figure out how it will help them meet their future husband.
Mary Washington students: The whole student body, there’s nothing better to do on the weekends.
Old Dominion students : Four, two to change the bulb, and two to figure out how to get high off the old one.
Radford students: Just one, but it takes six years
Randolph-Macon students: None, they’ll just drink in the dark
Sweet Briar students: One to change the bulb, and three to call up daddy and cry and complain about how awful the whole experience was.
University of Richmond students: Two, one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.
UVA students: One, he just holds the bulb and lets the world revolve around him.
VCU students: None, downtown Richmond looks better in the dark.
VMI students: One Rat to actually change the bulb, one upperclassman to yell at him for not doing it fast enough, one to yell at him for not using the proper wattage, and one to send him up to the Rat Disciplinary Committee for letting the bulb burn out in the first place.
Virginia Tech students : Three, one to change the bulb, and two to discuss how they did it just as well as a UVA student.
Washington and Lee students: Four, one to change the bulb, three to write up a complaint to the board of directors stating that they could have gone to a better school if they had wanted to.
William and Mary students: Three, one to change the bulb, and two to crack under the pressure.
SO ACCURATE. EMBARRASSED AT MYSELF @ UVA
Q:what makes me laugh even harder than the tuukka tag is when people get pissed in it when they get called out for being generally shitty taggers and putting crap in the tag and get offended by it
at first i thought you were subtweeting me lol.
but HONESTLY YES. i was just talking to my friends like… i wish i could have a real discussion with them about it or something but THERE IS NO SENSE OF SELF-AWARENESS AT ALL
Q:I may be late but happy birthday!
none of you understand my feelings right now. this is like the total opposite of the tweets that were out earlier. and tuukka loves timmy so much im gonna cry
claude is so annoyed. AND TUUKKAS SO SAD IT MAKES ME SAD.
but to clarify the “fight” comments, thats just tuukka trolling for attention. typical. BUT REALLY. TUUKKAS SO FUCKING SAD I WANT TO DIE I CANT HAVE THEM PLAY EACH OTHER UGH